We have all been guilty, at one time or another, of saying yes to things we don't want to do and going out of our way to please others at the expense of our own well-being. Here's how to stop.
People pleasing often starts in childhood, when someone doesn't have, or doesn't give themselves, permission to put themselves first.People pleasers tend to be over-observant of micro-expressions and verbal nuances in others.
We’re all susceptible to the effects of the people-pleasing syndrome—children, teens, adults, and parents. Psychologist and author Harriet B. Braiker referred to people-pleasing in her book,. She noted, “People often say ‘yes’ when they’d rather say ‘no,’ setting off many problems.” For them, the uncontrollable need for the elusive approval of others is like anStatistically, people-pleasing behavior is more prominent in women than men.
Don’t offer unsolicited advice, guidance, or problem-solving strategies unless you’re specifically asked. We engage in these behaviors to secure a feeling of indispensability for the relationship. However, if guidance is ignored, it can create frustration and resentment. People pleasers are over-observant of micro-expressions and verbal nuances. Avoid overthinking or personalizing interactions. Exercise patience to wait and see if anything is wrong. Practice developing alternative scenarios that verify what you saw that has nothing to do with you. Exercise frustration tolerance to avoid security check-ins before making assumptions.
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