Should I finally let her know what happened when she was at college?
I have not yet told her. I’m worried that she will blame our parents, or even try to track down the teacher who gave our brother the zero .
I think you should train your focus outward and understand that there were likely many factors and perhaps additional triggering events that led to this tragedy. When you have this conversation, you may learn that she has an entirely different understanding of the event. She wasn’t living at home at the time, but she may have insight that you lack, due to the difference in your ages.
It is simply overwhelming, and I intuit that you are still overwhelmed and somewhat trapped in the storyline of that long-ago trauma — because you are extremely worried now about your niece’s emotional and mental health, all tied to the pressure of schooling for a kindergartner.I’m a millennial guy nearing 40 with about 10 years of dating experience before COVID hit.
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