'I never expected I'd have to explain to a customer that they couldn't have their goat in the restaurant.'
"A customer walked into the lobby with a goat. A full-grown goat shitting in the lobby. I never expected I'd have to explain to a customer that they couldn't have their goat in the restaurant."
"A while later, a very drunk man wearing a white shirt with stains that looked like blood all over him came to the bar to order a drink. The smell returned. It took me a few seconds to realize this man had shit himself and proceeded to wipe his hands on his shirt and SEVERAL areas in the club.""Guys regularly grab my hand and kiss it. I’m pretty used to that flirting. But one time, a guy grabbed my hand and sucked my finger.
"Once again, she looked at her mom and said, 'I gotta potty NOW!' and again her mother just shrugged it off. The little girl stood up, walked to the aisle, dropped her pants, and squatted. The looks on everyone’s faces were priceless. Once the child was done, the mom asked my coworker if he was going to clean it up. He handed her a towel and said, 'Nah, you should’ve listened to her the first time.
"I had to plead with him not to beat my face in with a pool cue. It was the most terrifying moment of my life.""Some girl broke the toilet in my night club. No witnesses, no noise, no injury. I still want to know how they managed to crack the toilet that way. The next morning, I’m bartending brunch, and we have the stall locked, taped, with a giant 'Out of Order' sign to prevent use.
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