Dear Abby: Partner who started out great is cold after 10 years

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Dear Abby: Partner who started out great is cold after 10 years
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He’s a good provider financially, but he thinks he doesn’t have to do anything more than that.

I feel lost and hurt. I feel like Blake deceived me in the beginning, and now that he thinks I’m not going anywhere, he doesn’t have to try. My self-esteem has suffered greatly. I have suggested counseling, but he refuses. Any advice will be appreciated.Because Blake refuses counseling doesn’t mean that YOU couldn’t benefit from it.

Counseling is the surest way to understand and break the pattern of your partner’s behavior, learn what your strengths are and turn your unhappy life around. You deserve to be happy, so start working on it now.When I prepare for family to visit, I know I’ll have to spend time with one relative who will repeat the same stories/facts/opinions ad nauseam. In the past, I have tried saying, “Oh yes, I remember you telling me that,” but he just continues.

Must I participate in these conversations? It seems odd pretending I haven’t heard the story, and telling him I’ve heard it doesn’t stop him. He’s been the same for the 30 years I’ve known him, so I don’t think there are any cognitive issues. I’m not sure why he does this, or how important that is. My gut is telling me that he’s awkward socially, inflexible and not interested in what others have to say.

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