It’s a bad idea. But there are good ways to do it.
“Every molecule of water desperately wants to cling on to every other molecule of water. So it has a kind of stickiness to it,” Winkless says.
Water molecules stick because they’re greedy. One side of them hoards electrons, creating an asymmetry the molecules remedy by clinging to other water molecules. By contrast, grease molecules are electronically balanced. Instead of sticking, then, they just glide past each other, reducing friction. Lubricants are important for facilitating motion—whether it’s in engines or during sex—and they are not exactly ideal when you’re trying to grip something.
But if you must, at least remove the grease first, says Kat Petronaci, a 38-year-old pole dancing instructor in the city.“The first people to try are usually the people that don’t end up getting up there because they’re the grease wipers,” she says. Grease or no grease, upper body strength and tension are crucial for getting up a pole, too. Ditch the hands and wrap your whole body around it. Opt for what Petronaci calls the inchworm approach: hugging the pole and slowly shimmying up.“Know your limits,” he says. “Try to leave your beer with your friend; it’ll be there when you come back down. And don’t overstay your welcome, because that’ll just make the police grab you.
Philadelphia police officers have already started slicking poles and erecting barricades in anticipation of Sunday’s Super Bowl. It’s unclear how effective these tactics will be. After the NFC Championship game, lifelong Philly resident Arielle Pierson was determined to climb a pole, police be damned. Out with her friend, they jumped on one but struggled. Until her “angel” arrived.
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