THE HEAVENS—Touting His latest majestic creation as the ideal recipe for wintertime fun, the Almighty God, He Who Reigneth Omnipotent in Heaven and Earth, released new peppermint-flavored chipmunks on Wednesday. “Just in time for the holidays, these festive yuletide chipmunks are the perfect treat for parents, kids,…
THE HEAVENS—Touting His latest majestic creation as the ideal recipe for wintertime fun, the Almighty God, He Who Reigneth Omnipotent in Heaven and Earth, released new peppermint-flavored chipmunks on Wednesday.
“Just in time for the holidays, these festive yuletide chipmunks are the perfect treat for parents, kids, and anyone on your gift list who might enjoy a sweet red-and-white-striped critter,” said God, explaining how, for a limited time only, His children could find the peppermint chipmunks scurrying through parks and backyards, where they could be snatched up and, once their necks were snapped, used as stocking stuffers.
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