'I felt like I was going to cry or scream at whoever said hi to me next. Everything at work just felt meaningless. My extreme reactions that day made me realize that I needed to do something drastically different.'
Credit: Getty
One Monday in June 2020, I was stretched to my breaking point. I was tired and cynical at the start of the day — and my schedule, full of meetings, was exhausting. In my mind, everything was wrong — no matter what my colleagues said. I ended each call just trying not to yell at the person on the other end. I felt like I was going to cry or scream at whoever said hi to me next. Everything at work just felt meaningless.
As any research-oriented individual would do, I looked up how to recover and worked with experts. I took time to design a programme to convalesce, so I could return to my vivacious and creative self.The first goal of my two-month programme was not to do anything for the first two weeks. I had been used to conferences, committees and day-to-day meetings — so I initially resisted.
My operations role was assumed by the instrument scientist. My scientific research project was put on hold. Two other colleagues agreed to help my postdocs. I felt both scared and relieved to delegate my responsibilities. I was anxious that my colleagues might decide that they didn’t need me at all, but I was thankful that work would not be not my responsibility for the next two months. Had I taken rest along the way, I wouldn’t have needed to be out of the office for such a long time.
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