Miss Manners: They don’t invite me to their parties, then they rub it in my face

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Miss Manners: They don’t invite me to their parties, then they rub it in my face
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If these young people exclude me, I don’t think they should talk about it in front of me.

: I go to a weekly drop-in fitness class where some of the students have been attending for years. I myself have attended for years, but on and off — not as religiously as some.

Recently, when we were all sitting around after class, they started talking about a little party they had at one of their homes. This went on for at least 15 minutes, while I and another woman just kind of sat there with nothing to say.GENTLE READERBut as these young people are rude enough to discuss plans that do not include everyone present, Miss Manners would not have thought this was a great loss.

The confusing part is that my employer will make remarks like, “Oh, I need to get your bonus to you” or “I keep forgetting your bonus! So now, with what you’re due, it’ll be a really good one.” So he is remembering them, but does not follow through. Then again, he is not in the office daily, and I may only see him once a month.

I’m in a mental pickle. I don’t want to insult my employer, but I also want either my bonuses or a reason why I’m not getting them. But primarily, I want my bonuses.: Although she does not know where you come from, Miss Manners doubts that, even there, it is considered rude to count your earnings — or insulting to correct a payroll error.

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