Dear How to Do It: I haven't confronted him or my friend...
I was set up with “Olga” several years ago. We dated for several months, I was very attracted to her both sexually and intellectually, and she professed the same. At the time, she was going through a divorce, I was busy with work and kids in school. We drifted. She started dating a friend of mine, “Dean,” they were secretive about it, but I was cool and happy for them both. Life was good.Then a couple of years ago, I ran into Olga at a show and sparks flew.
If you guys had the spark you say you did, I wonder if she would have moved on and pursued something with Dean instead of just waiting to pursue your chemistry when her divorce no longer took up most of her energy. It’s also weird that both she and Dean have a different perspective of what’s going on. I’d decide if you value your friendship with Dean more than a relationship with Olga. After you find your answer, you’ll know what to do.
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