My kid didn't feel like two moms were enough. It was time for 'project queer' 🌈
When our five-year-old kept asking about his dad, we knew we had to go big, so we found a way to instil some gay pride while fulfilling his need for a father figureI remember the first time someone asked me who my son’s father was. We were sitting in the nursing station of Scarborough Grace hospital, and I was in pain. My
Because I ignored and didn’t challenge the assumptions that something was missing from our family, Jacob picked up on the prejudice and responded in kind. When he was three, he started asking to see his daddy. Then at age four came the theories: That his father used to live with us, his two mums, but got bored and wandered off, or that Jacob did something bad and his dad had to suddenly leave. The last one got me—it felt like someone had speared my stomach.
Even if there isn’t one person telling the child of queer parents that something is wrong with their family set-up, they can absorb it in other ways, according to Hudak. Even when kids don’t learn from outsiders subtly stigmatizing the queer family, they can pick up these attitudes from language itself.
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