Scientists Find Link Between How Pathetic You Are, How Fast You Respond To Emails

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Scientists Find Link Between How Pathetic You Are, How Fast You Respond To Emails
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CHICAGO—According to a study published this week in the Journal Of Contemporary Ethnography, scientists at the University of Chicago have established a definitive link between how promptly an individual responds to emails and how pathetic that person is as a human being. “Our research shows that, without exception,…

, scientists at the University of Chicago have established a definitive link between how promptly an individual responds to emails and how pathetic that person is as a human being.

“Our research shows that, without exception, only the saddest and most pitiable individuals will reply to a new message in their inbox within moments of receiving it, whereas those who respond after an extended period—oftentimes up to multiple days—are invariably more socially adept, confident people,” said sociologist Daniel Moran, confirming that the length of time that passed between receiving a given work or personal email and sending a reply was directly correlated to the level of...

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