Dear How to Do It: He says he wants to, but his body language says otherwise.
I’m a late-40s bisexual female in a long-term relationship with a straight late-40s male. I really enjoy giving him oral sex. In fact, I can’t even think of a sexual encounter with him that I didn’t spend a good hour just loving his taste, his smell, and his reaction to my attention.My problem is reciprocation. He says that he loves to go down on me, but I have to ask for it about 98 percent of the time.
Alternatively, you could just come to terms with your partner’s effective ineptitude. No matter what he says, what he’s doing is not pleasing you. Sometimes people find themselves in dynamics that aren’t strictly equal for a variety of reasons, and sometimes non-reciprocation is actually prized. You love to give him head—is that love enough to make you OK with your overall oral sex life? It seems like no, but embracing the reality as opposed to whatbe could at least be a way to calm your mind.
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