Why people experience more envy over smaller gaps of inequality—and how it affects their relationships
Nevertheless, Christine Whelan claims that most high-achieving men report that they would like to marry, or have already married, a woman who is as smart, or smarter, than they are. These men believe that, in marrying such a woman, they have made a smart deal. However, Elizabeth Bruch and M. E. J. Newman show that there is a limit to the desirable gap: both men and women pursue partners who are on average about 25 percent more desirable than themselves.
Another reason for the importance of little things is that they last for a long time. You can buy diamonds for your partner once a year or so, but you can blow a kiss from across the room many times a day. In this sense, the most significant aspect of love is not the intensity of sexual interactions, which sometimes occur multiple times per week, but rather your attitudes and care in between these explosive experiences.
Anton Chekhov once wrote, “Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out.” A hero is someone who successfully handles major risks or crises. A lover strives to handle the ongoing little things in the loving relation. Little things indeed mean a lot.References Ben-Ze’ev, A. . The arc of love: How our romantic lives change over time. University of Chicago Press.cience AdvancesPrins, K. S., Buunk, B. P. & Van Yperen, N. W. . Equity, normative disapproval and extramarital relationships.
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