Wretched Outcast Woman With Combination Skin Forever Trapped Between Dry And Oily Worlds

Norge Nyheter Nyheter

Wretched Outcast Woman With Combination Skin Forever Trapped Between Dry And Oily Worlds
Norge Siste Nytt,Norge Overskrifter
  • 📰 TheOnion
  • ⏱ Reading Time:
  • 24 sec. here
  • 2 min. at publisher
  • 📊 Quality Score:
  • News: 13%
  • Publisher: 51%

BROOKLYN—Doomed to wander the Earth imprisoned by a complexion requiring both mattifying and hydrating products, sources confirmed Monday that wretched outcast of a woman Hattie Jean was forever trapped between the realms of the dry and the oily due to her accursed combination skin. “No matter where I go, whether…

Doomed to wander the Earth imprisoned by a complexion requiring both mattifying and hydrating products, sources confirmed Monday that wretched outcast of a woman Hattie Jean was forever trapped between the realms of the dry and the oily due to her accursed combination skin.

“No matter where I go, whether high-end makeup counter or local drugstore, I’ll never be truly greasy enough or purely flakey enough to truly belong,” said the 31-year-old who was cursed by a tragic accident of birth to spend the rest of her unbalanced cutaneous life marooned between moisturizing and exfoliating. “When I walk the skin care aisle, women gawk at the dull glisten of my T-zone and the angry red splotches of my cheeks, and they shudder in disgust.

Vi har oppsummert denne nyheten slik at du kan lese den raskt. Er du interessert i nyhetene kan du lese hele teksten her. Les mer:

TheOnion /  🏆 724. in US

Norge Siste Nytt, Norge Overskrifter

Similar News:Du kan også lese nyheter som ligner på denne som vi har samlet inn fra andre nyhetskilder.

Meet Stephanie Headley: The Woman Now Set to Refresh Olay Skin CareMeet Stephanie Headley: The Woman Now Set to Refresh Olay Skin CareOlay has a new leader at its helm and she’s on a mission to see the skin care brand inside everyone’s medicine cabinet.
Les mer »

Jennifer Aniston & Courteney Cox Look Stunning As They Reunite For a Mini 'Friends' Reunion: 'Friends Forever'Jennifer Aniston & Courteney Cox Look Stunning As They Reunite For a Mini 'Friends' Reunion: 'Friends Forever'We're loving this mini-'Friends' reunion with Courteney Cox and Jennifer Aniston!
Les mer »

Baker Mayfield gets statue at Oklahoma with NFL future in limboBaker Mayfield gets statue at Oklahoma with NFL future in limboBaker Mayfield’s future remains up in the air, but his past is immortalized forever.
Les mer »

Several wildfires burning in Colorado; most contained but fire danger persistsSeveral wildfires burning in Colorado; most contained but fire danger persistsOne home was lost after a wildfire was sparked Saturday south of Highway 34 east of the town of Yuma. Dry and windy conditions will continue Sunday
Les mer »

At least 7 separate wildfires burning in Colorado; most contained but fire danger persistsAt least 7 separate wildfires burning in Colorado; most contained but fire danger persistsAt least seven separate wildfires are burning across Colorado amid dry and windy conditions.
Les mer »

13 Dry Shampoos To Extend Wash Day All Spring & Summer13 Dry Shampoos To Extend Wash Day All Spring & SummerHere are 13 suggestions to help you find the best dry shampoo to use this season and beyond.
Les mer »



Render Time: 2025-04-03 03:46:39