Miss Manners: I don’t have plans this weekend but that doesn’t mean I’m free to do favors

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Miss Manners: I don’t have plans this weekend but that doesn’t mean I’m free to do favors
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How do I counter the assumption that since I’m not busy, I want to do something for them? Sometimes I just want to do nothing.

GENTLE READER: Your complaint is valid, but for consistency, Miss Manners suggests you revise your own script when you are doing the asking. Opening with “Are you busy tomorrow because ... " is what we are trying to stamp out, even if your construction gives the recipient a few seconds to think up a prior commitment.

The answer, when you are asked about your own schedule, is “Why?” -- which Miss Manners instructs you to deliver with a winning smile, not a suspicious sulk.

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