Verbal abuse is often justified in the name of “discipline,” “improvement,” “toughening up,” or “setting the bar high.” Here's how to recognize it when you see it—either between parent and child or in a romantic relationship.
. It was horrible. I am lucky in that my high school guidance counselor ‘got it’ and helped me turn myself around. My father attributes my success to how he brought me up. He just doesn’t get it. The current drama is how he talks to my 6-year-old son. I have warned him that if he doesn’t stop, I am of out of there.”. She wanted the world to see her home and garden as perfect, and that included the children in that home.
Despite how the treatment is justified or normalized, there’s no question about it; it is verbal abuse. What makes this more complicated is that many adults don’t have a clear idea of what “verbal abuse" is; I think many people still abide by the “sticks and stones” thing and if someone doesn’t punch you, nothing much happened.
It’s hard to overstate how hypercriticality affects a child’s sense of himself or herself and trust in his or her abilities, not to mentionIn adult relationships, the abuser may also rely on justification, but criticism shifts from being about an action—overspending, lateness, unwillingness to share chores equally, or anything else—to being highly personal.
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